This morning I am sharing very personal thoughts. I find myself sifting through the dusty cobwebs of time and memory going back 30, 40 years.
I am revisiting past feelings of inadequacy, confusion, loss and insufficiency, Lord. So many years ago I was caught in a life that was very painful and lonely. As I prayed and struggled my way through the stormy waters of my life, I was fearful to share my love of You with others. I felt I had no words anyone would want to hear. My only platform back then was my singing voice and I sang praises to You. I was a soloist, in a woman’s emsemble, and choir for a very long time. I always felt there was an incredible emotional and spiritual connection when music connected with lyrics and touched someones’ heart. You gave me words. Now in these present days, I no longer have that “voice.” I can no longer sing as I could then. The loss of my singing voice has been an adjustment for me, I confess. Yet You still give me words! The voice You have given me in these days is with the brush strokes of my paints and the written word.
How amazed I am Lord. I hardly know how to process this life You have given me. I am unworthy of Your Love! Yet You have given me Your worthiness and used this cracked and broken vessel to hopefully encourage others through their stormy waters. I pray for those who feel they are drowning where they might be today – they are not! You are there as they reach out and grab the lifeline of Your presence to save them. You are faithful and worthy of praise. I LOVE YOU, LORD and am speechless before You. Holy Spirit, I pray You would speak through these written words to encourage someone this day.
Now we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this surpassingly great power is from God and not from us. 2 Cor. 4:7